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Things That Are None Of My Business And I Don’t Really Know The Truth About But I Am Judgemental So I Will Talk About

I normally don’t talk about celebrity crap, because celebrities annoy me. I’m sure they annoy most people too. I’m annoyed that they complain about having their pictures taken. I’m annoyed that they complain about anything when they make as much money as they do. I’m annoyed at the ones who are famous for being famous. I’m annoyed that marriage is flippant with them. I’m annoyed that they have award shows so that they can recognize how great they think they are. I’m annoyed that I can’t stop reading about them. I’m annoyed at a lot more things about them, but I won’t go on.

Right now I’m really annoyed at Angelina Jolie. I used to be really in to her. I always said that if there was any girl I’d sleep with, it’d be her. I’m straight, but I used to be attracted to her. I used to think that she was stunningly beautiful, and extraordinarily sexy.

Now I think she’s just a hoe bag.

My attraction to her started to wane around the making-out-with-her-brother/tattoos/Billy Bob Thornton era. She started to seem way too weird, and that made her less sexy to me. I mean, kissing your own brother passionately? Thinking about it with my brother makes me gag. Wearing blood around your neck? Ruining that amazing body with ugly tattoos? I found myself less wanting to have sex with her and more wanting to take a shower when I thought about standing near her. But still, she was so hot in Tomb Raider…

Then comes this Brad Pitt thing. Don’t get me wrong; I think Brad Pitt is a hoe bag in this situation, too, but I’m not talking about him right now.

Maybe I’m just some pissed off chick who has been cheated on several times and has a complex about it, but Angelina’s relationship with Brad annoys me to no end. Some people say that you can’t help who you’re attracted to, and I’d have to agree with that. But you can prevent yourself from developing feelings for someone who is married, attraction beside the point. It’s simple: you don’t spend any more time with them than professionally necessary. If you still get the hots for said married person, then ignore them. Why? Because like or not, that person is married. This is not just someone’s boyfriend. This is someone who has bound themselves to another person from sharing a bathroom to the eyes of God.

I feel it my duty to acknowledge to myself that I have gone from wanting to do Angelina to wanting to punch Angelina. I’m no longer a fan. I don’t want to see her movies, I don’t feel happy for her pregnancy, and I don’t think she’s a good person for her charity work. I think she’s a hoe bag.

I’m also annoyed with her media coverage. It’s all Angelina and Brad this, Angelina and Brad that. How painful must that be for their families and EX-WIFE. Not only did Jennifer Aniston get dumped by her husband, it’s rubbed in her face how wonderful they are: Oh, look at the new golden couple! Isn’t that great, they go to Africa and adopt babies and do charity work! Isn’t that great, they’re pregnant. If I ran the media, it would be more like this: Oh, look at the slut bag adulterers! Isn’t that pathetic, they’re trying to make up for their moral ineptitude by traveling to Africa and adopting babies. How trashy, they’re pregnant!

Okay, okay. It seems like I’m taking this personally, and maybe I am. I’ll stop my rant now.

End.

posted by Jen @ 1/12/2006 12:44:00 PM