Monday, October 31, 2005

Happy Halloween!

I'm pretty sure that just about everyone who blogs today is going to use that as their title.

First things first, thanks to John and Erin for throwing such a great party and letting us come. Your decorations were great and it was lots of fun!

In honor of Halloween, I've decided to not watch what I eat today. For example, I am currently breakfasting on a cupcake shaped like a spider that someone left in the lunchroom. I saw it when I was getting my coffee. Mmmm...someone just sent an email around that there are haystack cookies too!

I'm disappointed that I won't have any trick-or-treaters tonight. Just another reason I'm sick of living in an apartment. Last year, Shan and I bought candy and waiting hopefully for a child to knock on our door. I don't know why we did it; did you ever trick-or-treat at an apartment complex as a child? This year we didn't bother to buy any candy. I've actually never had the pleasure of trick-or-treaters coming to my door, even when I lived at my parents' house. We lived on kind of a really short block (it was us and two other houses), so most of the kids didn't bother coming up to our house. They stayed down the hill where there were lots of houses all together.

I'm also disappointed that I don't have a house because I'd really like to decorate for Halloween. I have a few things up, like a centerpiece on the dining room table and a witch's hat thrown on top of a vase. I would like to get one of those witches that are smashed into the side of a house, or a scarecrow for the front porch, or a ghost to hang from the front tree. Well, hopefully in a couple of years a house will be possible so I can have those things!

We went to a dress-up Halloween party Saturday night, which was a lot of fun (I won sexiest costume and earned myself a lunch box prize!). I only saw two people who came in a clever costume. One was very funny (he dressed in a large brown sack-like thing with flames, and called himself Hot Shit) and one was tired and lame (the old cereal killer routine). They got me thinking about other clever costumes I've seen. On the radio this morning, a man said that he wore chicken bits in a ziplock bag, tied over his neck with a cord, and a blue shirt. He was chick cord on blue. I like that one a lot. I guess the appeal of dressing like some sort of interesting, scary ghoul or whorish french maid just mostly wins out over creative costumes. Not that there's anything wrong with that! After all, I've never done anything clever for Halloween.

This Halloween, Shan and I thought we were going to be SO original. Months in advance, we decided to be pirates. We'd never seen anyone dressed as a pirate, and we were very excited to have come up with a good idea rather than a common one. We told the hosts of the party our plans a few weeks before, and they said, "Wow! That's the most clever idea ever!"

Just kidding. They said that they were going as pirates as well.

WTF! All that brainstorming and coming up with ideas and finally settling on something we've NEVER SEEN BEFORE and by CHANCE someone else did the same thing?

We discussed changing our ideas. I personally did not like the idea of showing up dressed like someone else, but after talking with the hosts again, we decided that it would be just fine. The hosts would only be one other couple out of everyone else dressed like us, and we could make it a two-couple theme instead of a one-couple theme. That didn't sound bad at all.

The night of the party, we show up. We're hanging out, talking with people, and we notice something strange...people keep showing up dressed as pirates. LOTS of people. There were about 8 people dressed as pirates at this party. Again, WTF! All that brainstorming and coming up with ideas and finally settling on something we've NEVER SEEN BEFORE and by CHANCE 6 other people did the same thing?

I have to say, it seemed to be one of those funny circumstances of chance that make you start to question God's sense of humor. Besides the disappointment of having thought so hard and then finding out you're not very original at all, it was kind of embarassing to be standing around and people saying to you, "I didn't realize this party was a pirate theme!"

However, despite it all, the party was a very good time and we liked being pirates for Halloween immensely. Now is the time, though, to plan out next year and make it the coolest costume every! I'm talking something bizarre and obscure that no one could possibly also be, like some sort of Japanese underground cartoon character that no one west of Tokyo has heard of.

Tuesday, October 25, 2005

Indiscriminate Babble (Warning, mostly shallow posting)

- It's getting cold in the evenings and mornings. I don't want to turn on my heat, first because it's only October and second because I'm scared of my gas bill. I'm going to go buy a space heater, to put in the living room when we watch TV and to have in the bedroom in the mornings. I've already closed the vents in the guest room & bath, and I guess I'll close the doors too. No need to heat those unless someone's comin' over.

- I'm on call this week and I got a call at midnight last night. It ripped me out of REM and I was almost unintelligible. My notes from the conversation look like a child's handwriting. Speaking of handwriting, do you remember in the 3rd grade learning cursive? I liked it, because I have nice handwriting and the teacher always made an example of me.

- I really, really need to take care of my Halloween costume. I have two pieces of it. I've found a third online. I'm still debating, though. Witch or pirate? I was a witch last year, and it would be SO CHEAP to go as a witch since I already have most of the costume...but Shan is going as a pirate, and I don't want to be left out.

- I'm going shopping over lunch. Yay! I love new seasons, because you get to buy new clothes. Speaking of, I need a pair of black, pointy-toed mules. Anyone know where to find them? I don't want to spend much, and they must by low-heeled. At 5'9", I'm a stinking Amazon when I wear heels.

- I'm debating my new coat right now. I want a long, wool coat to wear to work this winter. I have a faux-fur trimmed black peacoat to wear when I dress up, and I have a cute white jacket when I'm dressed down. I have nothing to wear to work. I have an adorable pink knit hat, scarf and glove set, so I'm thinking white or cream would be a good choice. But then again, I would really love a pink coat. The problem with a pink coat is that my pink accessories would not match...and white is really easy to find this season. Man, the problems I face in my life!

- God, I really sound like a girl in this post.

- My dad called last night and said that he wants to host a Thanksgiving dinner for his kids & my stepsiblings at his place this year. The problem is, that splits the pie into four portions. Now Thanksgiving has to be divided between Mom, Dad, Shan's mom, and the Meyer Thanksgiving celebration at my aunt's. That's too much for one day. Here's what I'm thinking: First, Mom doesn't really care about Thanksgiving. It's an American holiday, and she's not American. Well, she is now, but she didn't grow up with the tradition, so while she likes it because she sees her kids, it doesn't have real meaning for her. So, I can cut Mom out on that day and go over to see her the day after. Also, I've been to the Meyer thing every holiday season except for when I've been in Ireland my whole life. So, they can do without me this year. It's not like it's the first time. Wow, that simplifies things a lot...so now Thanksgiving is just Dad and Shan's mom. Sweet.

Friday, October 21, 2005

Things That Make My Head Pop Open And Ooze Fried Brain Matter

Trying...to get...anger...under...control...

Dumb Ridiculous Government Mismanagement Crap

Can someone explain to me what the purpose of this bullshit is? Why, oh WHY is our government concerning themselves with this issue.

Is it going to save the environment/a labor group/starving children if we get rid of analog TV?

Is the $3 billion they’re going to spend on this some sort of special money that will kill the schoolchildren if it’s spent on schools instead? HELLO, we have a very serious problem with our education system! It’s inadequate and underfunded! HELLO, are there any senators out there with PRIORITIES?

I think that if I was poor, I’d rather have money to pay my astronomically crazy gas bill than get a new digital cable box.

I’m glad that our government in taking the time to deal with this, because if not they’d have to spend time figuring out how to fix our struggling economy/decrepit public education system/health care crisis.

I'm Missing 6 pounds

Oh that's right...I'm not missing it, I'm glad it's gone! Yay for me! After finally deciding that I must get serious about dieting on the weekends as well as during the week, I've seen payout. Woo-hoo!

I stopped to get gas yesterday at this stupid gas station run by jerks. I filled up my car and went inside to pay. I opened my check book and started writing, when the guy behind the counter said, "We don't take checks." So then I began to take my card out of my wallet, and he said, "Our card machine is down." Um...okay. "Where's your ATM?" I asked. His reply? "We don't have one. But there's a bank down the street."

Now, why wouldn't this information have been given to me before I pumped $30 worth of gas into my car? I was running late getting back to work, and I didn't have time to spend 10 minutes hunting for a bank. "I'll have to bring it to you later," I told him. Then, he put on his asshole face. "Well, people who say that never come back. You'll have to leave something here." Ugh, fine. "What about a check?" I ask. "You can hold it, and if I don't come back you can cash it." He looked at me like I was retarded. "WE DON'T TAKE CHECKS!" He said in the snottiest voice I've heard in a long time.

Like it's MY fault. What an asswipe. Now, I suppose I could have screamed at him and just left without paying, but 1. it's scary because they're making such a big deal about punishing gas stealers these days and 2. it's illegal and I really didn't want to do it. So, I left my credit card wiht him (SCARY) and today I have to take him cash. Trust me, I didn't want to leave my card, but he was INSISTENT, as were his parents, the owners, who came out front during my argument with him. I probably should have called the darn police myself on these nutcases.

Anyway, we'll see what happens around 11am when I go back up there.

Monday, October 17, 2005

Drinking Everything in Site

I can't keep liquor in my home. That is, liquor I like. I sit there on my couch and I see it in the cabinet and I want to drink it. It's like being 10 and having $5 in your pocket. You buy the first toy you see because you cannot stand to not use that $5. I can't stand to not drink my liquor.

I fail at having a stocked liquor cabinet. I'll go out and buy 10 bottles of wine and a couple of kinds of liquor to put in my cabinet. You know, so when people stop by they can have a drink if they choose. It never lasts more than a couple of weeks. I'll see that wine bottle as I eat my dinner and think, "I should have a glass of wine with my dinner." So I'll do it. Then the next night, I'll be eating my dinner, and I'll think, "Well, the bottle's already open..." Before you know it, my wine racks are all empty again! Then Friday night will come along and I'll find some excuse about why I can't go to the liquor store before I go to that friend's house. I'll just grab my stock of rum off the liquor cabinet and take it along. Then comes the guilt...I'll look at my empty liquor cabinet while entertaining visitors and curse myself for not buying more instead of drinking the stuff I have. I'll peer into their thirsty little faces and just know that they think I'm a terrible hostess.

I currently have a nicely stocked liquor cabinet. I have a decanter of white rum, a bottle of spiced rum, a decanter of gin, a large bottle of bourbon and a bottle of vodka. I need to reach down inside of myself and NOT ALLOW MYSELF TO DRINK WHAT I HAVE IN THAT CABINET. If I feel like drinking some night, I need to drive my happy butt down to the liquor store and purchase more liquor. I should do that anyway, as Bombay Sapphire liters are on sale for $28...

Wednesday, October 12, 2005

My first Tag!

I was tagged by Pizzle.

1. How old were you when you found out Santa was not a jolly man, but your Mom and Dad? I don't remember, because I really have the memory of an Alzheimer's patient.

2. Who was the first celebrity's poster you had hanging on your wall? NKOTB baby!

.3. How many times have you heard the phrase, "Please step out of the car Ma'am/Sir."? Once, but I wasn't in trouble...it was Shan. :)

4. What is the lamest reason for breaking up with someone you have ever gave or received? I'm one of those people who is really honest with people when I break up with them. I can't remember ever making up an excuse. I just tell them why.

5. What is the dumbest lie you ever told your parents to get out of something? I told my mom that my drill team coach had lost my uniforms. My school was threatening to not graduate me because I hadn't turned them in yet, but I'd left them in another school's locker room. My mom believed me and took on the coach. Mom won, and I always felt bad about that.

6. Paper or Plastic? Paper. I hate trees. Just kidding, plastic.

7. What did you want to be when you grew up when you were little (under 10)? An architect. I wanted to be an architect from, like 5 years old until my first year at college. I realized that what architects really do isn't my style so I dropped the major.

8. What do you want to be when you grow up now? I'd like to do private therapy, once I get my master's. Cha-ching!

9. What kind and color of underwear do you have on right now? Black G-string.

10. What CD are you ashamed to admit you own and listen to? NSync.

11. Who would you sleep with if you had the opportunity to? Shanshu. Or Collin Farrell. They're about the same in hotness, really.

12. Finish this sentence and say what movie this is from. The FBI is going to pay me to ______? (I know you will read this first, but if you didn't know don't lie.) No clue.

13. Are you a lame asshole who lied on the above question? No.

14. Why did you come to the blog that tagged you? Because I'm stalking Pizzle. Don't tell him.

15. What is your biggest fear? Falling. I dream about it, I get nasty vertigo, and I have trouble standing on chairs.

16. Do you watch reality television and why/why not? I used to watch it a lot. I watch it rarely now. I liked to watch it because it made me feel good about myself, but now I'm bored with it. I still love SuperNanny and Trading Spouses, though!

17. Have you ever slept with someone and wondered why the hell you did that? Oh God yes.

18. What is your biggest regret? Not taking my undergrad seriously enough the first two years. I really screwed myself.

19. How old where you and what happened the first time you got drunk? I was about 10 and it was at my parents' friend's house. He was feeding my Hot Damn behind my parents back. I just remember feeling REALLY tired. My dad went ballistic about that one.

20. Which would you rather be, the hammer or the nail? Nail.

21. What is your favorite curse word? "Fuck" because it has so many meanings.

22. If there was one thing you could ask your parents, but never had the guts, what would that be? I feel comfortable asking my parents anything.

23. What are 3 things that make you go Hummm? Religious Nutcases, the way a vagina feels from the inside (it's so weird!) and Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch', which is the name of a village in Wales.

24. Real or fake boobies? Have? real. Like? both.

25. Do you like being tagged by people? Sure, why not?

Feeling Human Again

Ugh...two days home in bed really throws off one's week. After spending the last two days sleeping on my couch due to a nasty little cold, I wanted nothing more than to join the real world again today. There are people who could happily spend all of their lives inside the four walls of their home, but I am not one of them. I missed work and I am glad to be back!

I've slept so much in the last couple of days that I woke up at 5:15 this morning, which is more than two hours before I normally stumble out of bed. It was kind of nice...I watched the news, folded some laundry, and still made it into the office 1 1/2 hours before schedule.

When I got into the office I had three messages from some collection agency looking for a broad named Beatrice. I don't know a Beatrice, and I've asked the collection agency to stop calling me. I called them again when I got in, and do you know what the rep (Mr. Chapman...the jerk wouldn't even tell me his first name) said to me? "I'm sorry ma'am, but for some reason our system isn't allow me to delete this number." So I guess now I'm just going to have to deal with getting Beatrice's collection calls. At least it's me work phone, and not my cell. THAT would really piss me off. I think I'm going to have fun with them when they call, though. I think it's time to play a little repeater. Do you wanna play repeater? Do you wanna play repeater?

The Vatican came out with a statement on gay priests last week. I was surprised at how relatively progressive the statement actually was. Essentially, the Pope has said that gay men can be priests, as long as they are not currently practicing and haven't for three years. Well, since priests can't have sex anyway, that doesn't seem like too bum of a deal. It seems to me that the Vatican realizes that it's not the time to be isolating any potential priests, but also realizes that because of it's traditions, they can't just say gay priests are OK. To me, it's a foot in the door for gay rights in Catholocism. Things aren't going to change all at once.

I got to thinking that in this way, the Catholic Church is turning out to be way more progressive than most large Protestant churches, especially in the U.S.. It makes me kind of happy to realize that the Church I consider myself a member of isn't joining forces with radical Christianity in condemning homosexuals. I happen to be one of those people who gets really, really mad about the lack of civil rights for gay couples. Any step in the right direction is what I consider to be part of the slow win (I hope, at least).

Anyway, since it's my first day of work, Happy Monday to everyone! I hope your week goes well.

Friday, October 07, 2005

MY APARTMENT BURNT DOWN LAST NIGHT

Happy Birthday to ME, Happy Birthday to ME, Happy Birthday dear ME-E, Happy Birthday to ME!

So, I'm not as young as I used to be. It's funny...I still feel 21. I still feel like I can go to the club and dance and drink until 4 and then be fine at 8 the next day for class (or work, now). But my body, my TREACHEROUS body, is refusing to comply. Case in point, Wednesday night. If you've read Shan's blog, you know we had a few drinks that night. We were both kind of feeling yucky yesterday, and what happened? WE WENT TO BED AT 10 LAST NIGHT. That's right, 10 freaking o'clock. Our decrepit old bodies were so tired from our ONE night of drinking that they gave out on us before the evening had even begun.

The thing is, I'm only 25 (for 14 more hours). I should still be able to drink all night long and rock it the next day, right? It's not like I'm 35. I've begun to wonder when the average age a person slows down on their partying is. I can't handle going out and drinking on both nights of the weekend anymore, because I...(oh God I can't believe I'm saying this)...like to get up early on weekend days and get stuff done, and I hate wasting time being hung over. I've also noticed that pretty much everyone I know who is my age has done this too.

So is it that we just have more important things to do with our time now? Or is it that we feel like we shouldn't act like college kids anymore? Or is it that our bodies have begun that slow creep into middle age, and these are the first symptoms? Or is it that we don't feel that need to be out and about in order to convince ourselves that we're not social losers, because we've grown past that? Or is it that we just THINK we're maturing and unable to party all night like we once could, but when we hit 40 we're going to look back on our twenties and realize we were so young and party-hardy? Or is it all five?

Tuesday, October 04, 2005

I really like that one song...

...on the radio. The one about the photograph. I'm fascinated by that man's voice. I was flipping channels the other morning and I caught the video. This did two things for me. First, it allowed me to find out that the band is Nickelback. Second, it allowed me to find out that the lead singer, Chad Kroeger, is really unattractive. It's disappointing to me that there isn't some hot guy behind that amazing voice, like Paul McCoy. Anyway, after finding out the name of the band, I went onto their site to look at what they've done before this new album. I looked at the list of popular singles they've had on the radio and realized that I am a big Nickelback fan and I just didn't know it. All of the songs were ones I really like; I just never knew they were all the same band. I need to get their CDs.

A Collection

1. Filing is my least favorite thing to do. I hate the fact that when the paperwork builds up, it has to be filed or else it keeps building up. We used to have people that did our filing at my agency, and I wish we still had them. Tonight I'm taking home 3-4 hours worth of filing and doing it on my butt, in my pajamas, in my living room tomorrow morning. It's a little more palatable that way.

2. I'm really hungry, but I forgot my lunch again. I went into the kitchen to look at the vending machine, and it was full of chips and candy bars. I don't want that crap. There was ONE healthier thing in there, so I bought it. I officially had A bag of Baked Lays for lunch.

3. I've been doing really well following my Weight Watchers...that is, Monday-Friday. For some reason, after working all week to maintain my healthy diet, I fail miserably each weekend. I don't know if it's that I'm at home with access to my kitchen, or if it's that I have no willpower on those days, or what. I need to stop doing that, because I'm hardly losing weight when I'm eating cheeseburgers on the weekends.

4. I've given up coffee, because the way I like to drink is really high-calorie. I like to make a very strong pot, and put like 30 servings of non-dairy creamer in it. That's 300 calories. I guess I could just get used to black coffee or put one tablespoon of creamer in my coffee. I wonder if nonfat creamer is much better...I'll have to see if I can make that work.

5. My brother is searching for his first apartment. He wants to move out of my mom's in January or February. I've been helping him look, and I've realized that it's hard to find an affordable place to live in this county. On his budget ($600/month), he HAS to live somewhere that is either run-down and depressing or full of criminals or in a really shitty neighborhood. Or all three. I feel really bad for him, and it makes me appreciate my place all the more.

6. Friday is pay day. Yay!

7. Mom is starting to get pissy that no one is hosting a party for her 50th next weekend. She keeps bringing up how she wants a party. Of course, there is a surprise party planned that's going to be HUGE, but she can't know about it. She's actually ticking me off, because she's being really aggressive about having a party. I mean, if she thought someone might be planning a surprise, how does she expect the secret to be kept if she keeps bitching me out for not having a party? If she's not careful I'm going to tell her I decided to go out of town that weekend just to make her more mad.

8. I want to call in sick on Friday, but I have two appointments that I can't break. That was poor planning on my part. I should have left it empty. I have a full day Monday, too. Darn it. No three day weekend for me!

9. I stayed at Pizzle's over the weekend and got to pet his cat. I miss my cat. I wonder if she hates me for abandoning her? I mean, she has a good home at my mom's, but I know she doesn't get the love and attention she used to get from me. I used to carry her around all day while I did chores around the house. She would lay over my neck and shoulders like a snake for as long as I'd let her. I also bought a second pillow for my bed because she likes to sleep right next to my head. Am I a pathetic cat owner?

10. I just wanted there to be an even number.

Monday, October 03, 2005

Birthdays

My birthday last year was like hitting a brick wall. For years I had been attending the weddings and baby showers of my closest friends, and buying going away presents for those who left college and found jobs far away from here. I had realized, somewhere in my brain I'm sure, that my circle of friends-to-go-out-with was dwindling away. I guess I just didn't realize that I was the last single, child-free one left until October of 2004.

That's when I celebrated my 25th birthday without a single one of my girl friends in attendance. Two have children and couldn't participate in a night of drinking, one is a workaholic AND obsessed with her new husband, and the rest have moved away. I still had a great time that night, because my boyfriend's friends were all there and they have, of course, become my friends....but there's just nothing like your girl friends.

Being the last one to marry/bear children/stay in the same city had never really bothered me before. I have a rich and fulfilling life, full of a job I love, a great boyfriend, many phonecalls with my girls, and a loving family. It's just that, this one night of the year, it strikes me deep and hard. (Leave it alone, Shan. I'll say it for you: "Like my D!")

So I had decided that this year, after fruitlessly attempting to get my girls to go out last year, I would forgo the party attempt and celebrate with my boyfriend alone. I asked him if he would take me out to Indian food (my favorite) and buy me a cookie cake with lots of icing. I had planned to go to Atchison for a ghost tour, but apparently the tour sells out months in advance. So then I had no plan except dinner.

Then I got to thinking...who is it that calls and wants to hang out every weekend? Who is it that I spend my free time and vacations with? It's Shan's friends. In fact, as often happens, I now consider them to be my friends too. I like being with them, and they make me happy just like my girl friends do (albeit not quite in the same way...you can't beat a lying around in pajamas eating brownies, watching Lifetime and giggling for hours). They even called Shan last week and asked what was going on for my birthday.

Why am I pouting about my friends all being boring, married mothers who live in Alaska when I have these considerate, fun people who I love to be around calling and asking about my birthday?

So now I'm over my pity party and ready to celebrate in style. I will, of course, ask my girls if they can get sitters and come out with me...but I know probably won't happen, and I don't mind. Want to know why? Because I'm gosh-darned happy knowing that these people will celebrate with me.